Monday, May 30, 2016

Do This Smart Thing

  One of the smartest, if not the smartest, thing to do is develop the ability to delay wish gratification.  You may come across a study called "the marshmallow study".  Small children were told they could eat a marshmallow right then, or wait and have two.  This was a study over time and the children who could wait turned out to usually be more successful in life.  Goals take time. Learning takes time.  When you are focused on reaching a goal the waiting is less painful.  So it is not just a matter of waiting but putting off instant wish gratification for a purpose.  You may have to invent or use all kinds of distraction strategies. Some may be better than others.  If you have a grasshopper mindset you will totally forget about the wish and the goal as well and get nowhere.  But if you endow the steps to waiting and working for a goal with a certain charge, with a sense of purpose, you will find that the time passes quickly.  That is probably why Christmas comes so quickly for parents and so slowly for children.  The children are just waiting for the presents.  The parents are purposefully trying to make the holiday happy for the children.
  So I suggest you look at the way you are living your life.  Are you living a "smart life"?  To live a smart life you have to do smart things.  Are you keeping in touch with people you care for?  That takes a bit of trouble.  Are you setting and reaching goals?  That also takes a bit of delay of instant wish gratification.  Put on your smart hat and take hold of your life.  It is your life.  Live it smartly.

Tuesday, May 17, 2016

The "I Am" Decision

   There is a basic life decision that some people make early in life.  Others make it later and some never seem to make it at all.  That decision is the "I Am" decision.  Not "I am ...some label" but simply "I Am".  Then it follows from that "I will".  In sociology there is a concept known as the "Mirror Image Self".  That refers to the way the parents and others reflect back to the child the way they see him or her.  This is strongly based on the what the culture wants the child to become.  If the child is seen as a warrior a warrior is often what the child grows up to become.  If he is seen as a seeker of knowledge a life long scholar is often the result.  Genetic disposition often accompanies the expectation of the culture.  Strong and fit people make for better warriors.  People who learn well make for better scholars.  But psychologists and sociologists often argue about the importance of "nurture versus nature".  For a person to truly be worthy of "The Smart Hat" they must take their life decisions into their own hands.  They must choose which labels they want and when they want them.  It is wise to choose a label such as "I am a person who is able to learn and solve problems".  This might not be an easy label but it is very useful and practical.  After all anybody who can learn to walk and talk can learn many more things.  Walking and talking are actually complex tasks.  But the small child keeps at each one, trying new things, exploring options, storing the memory of successes, until at last the the task is mastered.  I am - I will - I can.  Of course the appreciation and encouragement of others spurs the child on as they learn.  But if there is not some inner drive it is not too likely the task will even be attempted, let alone mastered.  I once knew a man who was a master mimic and seemed to be obsessed with the way others saw him.  He had joined gangs as a teen because he thought it was the expected thing to do. He would take on the voice texture and behaviors of whoever he was around.  If he was around good workers, he was a good worker.  If he was around drinkers he drank.  He had some slogans that gave him some structure to his life but he was amazingly not self-directed.  In other words, he could be trusted about as far as he could be thrown. He had not made the "I Am" decision, he had not mastered self-control.  He is currently in prison where he is controlled by others. That works for him.  I doubt it would work for all.  The "I Am" decision is a wise and smart decision.
   I suppose I should mention ways to develop the "I Am" decision.  It is mostly a matter of being quiet and observing your perceptions and your judgments of these  perceptions.  I see,  I sense, I observe, I like, I want, etc.  I remember one or two, perhaps more, times in my life when I felt I was off track.  I spent some time each evening going over my day and judging my activities, whether they had been things I had done that I like or not, and whether I had achieved the results I wanted.  I had to go through some hard times to get back on track, but I managed it.  It is very smart to work towards the life you want for yourself.  There isn't necessarily any buttons to push or any magic bullets.  But developing skills you want and need is a satisfying way to live.  So put on Your Smart Hat and be who you want to be.
     

Friday, April 15, 2016

It's Time To Be Smart

I write this blog to spread the word that people are smarter than they realize.  A bit of education and a few clear thinking skills can do wonders.  But the two biggest blocks to being your true smart self are poor time use and poor self image.  Now I have to digress here a bit. It might be true, but I don't like it to be said, truly stupid people are too stupid to know they are stupid.  I think people try things and when they don't work out they are labeled stupid things.  Lack of awareness can be a protective thing.  Emotions play a tremendous role in all we do.  Emotions play a role far greater than most people realize.  So one of the first time management rules I would offer is: Take the time to be aware of your actions. Judge whether they got you what you wanted.  If they did, pat yourself on the back.  If those actions didn't work, pat your self on the back for putting out effort.
Rule #2 Set goals.  This is one of those big little things.  On nights I don't sleep well my main goal the next day if to find time for naps.  I might say I have other goals but my drive is towards a nap.
So there you have rule #3 Take some time, every day, to think about your drives, your goals, what you want, how you want to live, and what influences you.  It can help a lot to do this with pen and paper in the form of a conversation between your "I" and "Me" selves.
I want to add one more rule for "Taking time to show that your are smart." Rule #4 Take a wee bit of time, every day, to notice that you are actually taking actions towards maintaining and improving the life you are creating. Just by being aware of an idea that you like, your inner self will direct you towards making it real.  So let me recap: #1 Be aware of the role of emotions in your life. Negative ones are just a signal of a need for change. Pat yourself on the back for recognition and action. #2 Set goals.  Start small.  Keep at it. #3 Take self awareness time. #4 Take time to note your progress.  It might be your own little secret right now, but you are smart enough to have a better life and you can do it.  Put on your smart hat and go for it.

Wednesday, March 16, 2016

Refuse to Cower

How the world sees you is, to some extent, up to you.  You can learn to influence this.  Of course, your basic nature, your inner integrity, cannot be hidden.  But your light will shine forth better if you help it.  One of the things a smart hat wearer does is refuse to be a sniveling coward.  I am not advocating fool hardy and bombastic behavior.  It is wise to be discrete.  But if you cower, your self image will shrivel.  I think it is a good idea right now to discuss what cowering is.  Fear is natural and can be helpful.  We can take a warning from our fear and prepare to face danger.  But to cower is to admit and exaggerate our fear without allowing our mind to think of ways to face and conquer that fear.  Here is a good scenario: A test is presented. A WOW reaction is felt.  You admit the test seems like an overwhelming obstacle.  Then your wise self kicks in.  You take on the test as a challenge.  Even one correct answer is a win.  Being calm will help you dredge up any knowledge or strategies you have.  So you calm yourself. You do not cower.  Most likely you will score higher than you expected.  This simple piece of paper will not bring you to your knees.  You are wearing your smart hat.  You are smarter than you think.  

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Baby Your Brain

It is supremely smart to create an environment for your brain to work well.  This means to avoid toxic substances and toxic behaviors.  You might even go so far as to have a sort of "baby talk" time with your brain.  That might sound, at first, ridiculous.  But the higher level of thinking that you want to practice is not reactive.  When the smart, or reasoning part of your brain is in charge you make better decisions and create a much better life. In order for this to take place you must sort out the impulses and reactions that come from the lower parts of your brain, such as the amygdala or reptilian brain. Conscious inner dialogue is essential to a smart life. If your feelings, such as anxiety, are coming at you full force it may be hard to be clear headed.  A little bit of loving self talk, even baby talk, may work wonders in the privacy of your inner dialogue.  Right now Donald Trump has a lot of followers in his bid to become the Republican candidate for President of the United States.  Mr. Trump is making a lot of stupid, vicious, arrogant and even silly statements that these followers are taking in as gospel.  A journalist used a lot of quotes from the infamous Adolf Hitler and attributed them to Donald Trump.  These Trump supporters said they approved of the statements no matter what just because they were said to come from Trump.  These fearful, poor at reasoning people would not be labelled smart.  But perhaps some of them may go to a quiet place and think about the conversation they had with this journalist.  They may be angry at first and dig in deeper with their reactive statements.  But some of them may engage in a bit a sweet talk with themselves.  The vulnerable inner self that we all have is a gentle two year old.  We need to care for them self.  It is the smart thing to do.  So put on your smart hat and baby your brain.  Grow up and take care of yourself and your brain.  You are smarter than you know.

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

It's Not How Smart You Are, But How You Are Smart

 There is a stereotype about what a smart person is like.  Mostly it is based on the ability to memorize certain facts and feed them back to authority figures.  I know a man who didn't stay in school past grade school but later got into college.  His teachers labelled him as dumb but I was amazed at the way he could identify so many different kinds of airplanes, among other bits of information he had at his fingertips.  Schools need to admit that different people learn in different ways and are drawn to learn different things.  All too often students are expected to only learn by sitting on a hard chair and listening to endless words coming out of a teachers mouth.  Memorization is not the end all and be all of education.  I actually asked one of my college professors once a question about his knowledge of History.  He told me that he wasn't sure he understood all that he had lectured on that day.  His lecture was mainly a memorization of what his professor had said when he had been a student in college.  Words passed down but not understood.  Rebel against this nonsense stereotype today.  Accept that you are smart.  Now go away from the label.  Start to explore the ways in which you are smart.  How do you learn?  Good spellers often learn by spelling out the word in a rhythm. Some people like to doodle and diagram and draw pictures to grasp the ideas they are learning.  Some chant.  Some listen.  Some Read.  Some write things out.  Some speak the facts.  Some need to talk new facts over with someone before they get into their brain.  Put on you 'Smart Hat' and explore the ways in which you are smart.

Thursday, January 7, 2016

Be Smart Like a Cat

  When it is time to learn something new you have to overcome a few things.  There is the inertia of the way things have been going along the same, without this new knowledge.  Then there is the uncertainty about whether it is of value or worth the trouble.We want variety but we just don't know about this new stuff.  Here is where watching the way a kitten approaches a new box to play with can pay off.  There will be a sneak approach.  Then a jump back.  Maybe a sideways sidle will take place.  Then a paw might reach out and bat at the box.  Maybe the kitten will try to bite the box.  There is not any prolonged contact with the box right away.  It is explored from all sides and in many ways.  Only when the kitten feels comfortable with that box will it become a place to crawl into and relax or groom itself.
   You can do the same thing.  Math, for instance, is simply counting.  But it can be counting in very complex ways.  Jump at it.  Play around with the concepts.  Jump back.  Go to a familiar place.  Find ways to jump at it from above.  Little bites and shoves.  Don't turn your back on it.  There is a reason people decided to count things.  When these reasons make sense to you there will be an "aha" moment.  Approach life like a cat and your Smart Hat will stand up proud and tall.